Gathering of Love With God's Action in Maisonnette, New Brunswick,
Through His Instrument, The Girl of My Will in Jesus
2007-09-21 – Part 1
The Girl of My Will in Jesus in the Holy Spirit: The Lord says that I'm an instrument, only an instrument; my Father Clément, my spiritual director – he's kind – he says I'm like a guitar: “When he needs you, he uses you; when he doesn’t need you, he puts you in a corner.”
And other priests, they say, “You’re like a paintbrush: he's the one who is the Master painter and when he uses you, he takes the paintbrush and after, when he doesn’t need you anymore, he picks up another one.”
Every one of us, we are all instruments; we belong to Jesus, and we don’t belong to anyone else but Jesus.
God the Father gave all his children to his Son; why did he give all his children to his Son? So that his Son could cleanse them, so that his Son could turn us into children of love.
We’re not all children of love; very few are, and Jesus says, “My children, if I were to show you what you are on the inside, we would find nothing that comes from God's pure love.”
We were created in God's likeness, but inside us we didn’t keep the treasure he put within us: his life, his graces, his unconditional love.
Us, we want to love, but we want to love with our exterior; our interior is too unknown to us for us to say that we love unconditionally.
Didn’t Jesus come on earth and say, “Love one another, love your enemies”? Well, why did he tell us to “love our enemies”? He added that because he knew that we didn’t love unconditionally.
When someone hurts us, we have trouble finding love, the love that we are ourselves for that person.
They say, “love your enemies”: “Yes, but with what, with what am I going to love my enemy? What have I kept within myself that will help me love my enemy? I've discovered that I've been spiteful my whole life, that I've been unable to forgive; I've been afraid all my life; I doubted others; I worried about others; all my life – I didn’t want to – but I was dominating; all my life, I manipulated because of one reason – I wanted to be loved; I wanted to be loved by others, but this was disguised, this was false – I was the one who didn’t love myself.”
Every one of us – we don’t love ourselves; when we’re afraid of not being loved, afraid of others, afraid of what’s going to happen, afraid of what has already happened and that we don’t want to relive, well, that’s because we lack love towards ourselves.
We don’t love ourselves enough to say, “God, he loves me; he loves me because I'm worth it. Why would I be afraid since I have everything? I have everything from Jesus, I don’t need to be afraid! I don’t need to be afraid that someone doesn’t love me – I am loved. I don’t need to be afraid of tomorrow – God the Father, my loving Dad in Heaven, takes care of me; he will provide. I don’t need to worry about the past; I don’t need to be afraid that it lands in front of me again – that bad thing that I did and that I don’t want others to know about. I don’t need to worry; Jesus came on the Cross; he has already taken everything, he forgave me; so, he forgave that movement, it’s already in the past, it doesn’t exist in my life anymore.”
We aren’t able because we don’t love ourselves enough: we don’t love the being we are; we’re unaware, unaware of what we are on the inside.
God nourishes us continuously; God takes care of us continuously, but we are continuously in that lack of love: “I'm struggling with myself, I'm drowning in my thoughts, I'm going crazy because of my uncontrollable behaviour, my heart is overwhelmed with all the feelings that rise up inside me all the time. If someone comes over and tells me, ‘Hey, you haven't paid your taxes?’ I’ll go crazy. The feeling that will emerge from inside me is going to control me and because that feeling is going to control me, I'm going to say words that won't be mine – they’ll be words that are foreign to me.
Because what I am on the inside is love: this is the love of our loving Dad, of our Father; this is the love of the Son who gave himself up for me; this is the love of the Holy Spirit who nourishes me constantly with his almightiness. I can see, I can hear; so, the Holy Spirit, he's always there nourishing all this inside me, but I'm incapable of realizing it; I'm still searching for myself.” And this, this is every one of us.
We’re not able to love unconditionally and Jesus is constantly turning his attention to us; he's always reminding us of these words: “Love one another as I love you, love your enemies.” Therefore, all this, it drives us on the inside: a life, a life that God nourishes.
Yes, we walk with this life, we walk with a life we’re unaware of: we are loved by God and we’re not aware of it; we’re protected by God and we’re not aware of it; we have God's strength and we’re not aware of it.
We walk and we’re always searching: we’re searching for comfort, we’re trying to find something that would bring us an answer to this emptiness in our life.
We came into this world fulfilled and yet, we have never felt that fulfillment inside ourselves, never: we have always been uncertain that we were loved, we have always been uncertain that the words we were hearing were words that were good for us.
One day, I'm really happy if someone says to me, “Hey, you’re really nice”, but then, at the slightest disappointment, I'm going to doubt myself, I'm going to doubt that those words addressed to me were true; I'm always questioning myself.
So, I need, I constantly need to be told that I'm nice, that I'm accommodating, that I'm brave, that I'm patient; I continuously need to emerge from what I am to go out and find something to help me live, because we all have difficulty living on this earth.
All our actions are like actions that have been lacking in flavour, conviction; to be sure that everything that we are through what we hear, our words, our thoughts, our actions, our feelings are good actions that please God.
Therefore, if they please God, they please us but we’re never certain of all this, never, because if we were certain of all this, we wouldn’t be afraid of dying, of leaving this earth.
We wouldn’t be afraid because we would know, we would know that we go on with our life that was visible to you, in order to go on with a life that was invisible to you. We wouldn’t be afraid of this but because of what we are, because of all this uncertainty, of this lack of love towards ourselves, we’re afraid of dying.
We’re always trying to keep on going a little while longer on this earth: “Not right away, Jesus; I want to come to you but not right away; I still have things to do.”
Oh! Then I think of people, and, “Oh, my goodness! I don’t want to leave my children, I don’t want to leave them all alone; what’s going to happen, they still need me!”
We’re all alone in a home for the elderly and we still hang on to our seat in front of our window, all alone: we don’t want to leave, we’re not ready yet.
This is simply because we haven't been fulfilled, we haven't fulfilled ourselves: we have always wanted to satisfy our children, our husband or our wife, this is what we have always wanted.
We made good food, did the housework; we went out, we went to work, we came home; we chopped wood, we heated the house; we brought home a salary, we fed them: we have always wanted to satisfy the needs of others.
But if we have always wanted to satisfy the needs of others, this is because there was something real inside us: that love was always there, that love that was enabling us to live despite our inadequacies.
Well, that love is God's love; there aren't two loves, two loves don’t exist – there is one love; there's only one God, there are not two.
And so, it’s this love that causes us to look at others, this love that makes us get up in the morning, this love that ensures we become even more attached to our work, this love that makes us: useful to others.
Yes, we want to be useful until the end; even if our legs don’t allow us to go forward anymore, we want to be useful; even if we no longer have a memory, we want to be useful.
People who have Alzheimer’s disease are people who are active, they’re people who want to fill in what they don’t remember.
They (these people) are there, they go to the door, and they don’t know where they’re going, but they carried out a movement.
They’re there, they scratch the corner of a table – they’re making a gesture, they’re doing something.
They take an article of clothing, they take it off, we put it back on them; they take the clothing and take it off again; sometimes, we even have to tie them up because they make repetitive movements and this could be dangerous if they were to make a sudden move.
These are people who are always moving, in a movement of love.
It’s love that makes the human being move, it isn't hatred; hatred, it makes one inactive: “Wait until I catch him, that one; I’ll get my revenge. I have stop and think.” From the moment when I stop, I think, I'm going to think of my revenge; I form a scenario in my head: “I’ll leave my house. I’ll pack my bags. I’ll never set foot in this house again. They’re going to be forced to sell the house, he’ll find himself all alone. I’ll take the children.” Punishment!
You see, this hatred we have is towards ourselves: it prevents us from moving, it prevents us from being true, it prevents what is inside us from emerging and fulfilling us.
Love is an accomplishment; we must accomplish ourselves through our own life, not through our neighbour’s life, which is the life of our husband or our wife, not through the lives of our children; we must, us, accomplish ourselves so we can be satisfied with ourselves.
Whether we’re ninety years old, ninety-one years old, we must always be proud of what we have done in the past because this is what we’re going to present, and the older we get, the more real this becomes. We think about it, we think about our life; we’re all these movements.
The person of a certain age, when she thinks, she always thinks of her family, about what she gave. She doesn’t think of the fights she had with her husband. It’s funny… her husband, who’s ninety years old, is the best husband in the world, he's a good life companion, and don’t go and talk against her husband!
All this was driving the person who has always been in that accomplishment, that love. It’s as if her life were becoming a movement before her eyes, and yet, she's here with us but it’s as if she were taking the time to enter within herself, to dig deep down and to bring out the best.
She's tired of judging herself, she's tired of demanding something external that would satisfy her; she leaves this up to the young. She's travelled her journey, this elderly woman, and she waits.
She's waiting for those moments of love that God will present to her; not right away, she's isn't quite ready yet but she knows, she knows that this will happen.
God in his almightiness: by the Holy Spirit, he enables us to understand these words that emerge from you and that enter inside me, and that are thrown back at you by the power of the Holy Spirit.
If we’re here together it’s to discover who we are together before God and not before ourselves.
We have nothing to prove to anyone; we have nothing to bring to the person sitting next to us. No, because we want, we want to receive, we want to discover, we thirst for the truth, we want the truth, we want to go forward in a world that is worth living in. And well, it is worth it to live in this world – this world is you, it’s you, it’s every one of you.
Yes, we’re worthy of living; yes, it’s worth it to breathe, it’s worth it to eat, it’s worth it to see, even if we have children who use drugs, children who have known drinking, sex that controls the senses, their senses. Yes, it’s worth it to be what we are despite all this because we’re in Jesus.
God the Father has chosen all of us to live in Jesus and those we love also live in Jesus.
Let’s look at what we’ve become: we have lived in a love that was unknown to us – we have an unconditional love inside us. Despite our bad thoughts, our anger, our actions, our feelings, despite all we have agreed to listen to and that wasn’t from God, well he, God, has placed his unconditional love inside us and he continued to love us because he's here.
It’s with this love that Jesus loves us; he's the Man God and he became Man out of love for us. Well, he's inside us; that love belongs to us, and it’s with this that we journey through life at every second.
And so, here is what God wants us to do: to look at ourselves from the inside in order to walk in this world, to walk among all this disappointment, among all these worries, these fears, these doubts, among apostasy.
Yes, we live in a world in which there is great apostasy.
You know, when we walk among those who don’t know that God loves them unconditionally, who also don’t know that they are unconditional love for themselves, then we are surrounded by a flavour that has no taste.
We seek the light of the world, which is the one of Jesus; we seek who we are; when we find Jesus, we find ourselves.
We seek the truth and the truth can only be found in Jesus. When we have found the truth in Jesus, we can claim to be true: we are the truth for ourselves.
We seek faith; we seek faith everywhere – in the eyes of a priest, in the eyes of a religious, in the eyes of a grandmother: we seek faith. Faith is Jesus. When we find Jesus in our life, we have found faith, we have found what we are in him.
We walk with him, we’re not afraid to go forth in a world of non-believers who say they don’t want the cross in their homes. And so, we walk, we walk because our cross is in us, because our cross is part of our life.
And we learn to love, we learn to love unconditionally what is inside us and is part of our life; when we have all this, we’re not afraid.
We’re not afraid to display our inner life because we become so true that it emerges effortlessly. Even if we wanted to hold it back, even if we wanted to lower our eyes, it emerges anyway.
Faith, we cannot hold back faith, we cannot hold back love, we cannot hold back the truth, we cannot hold back justice, because everything that we are, we are so in Jesus: all this, it’s inside us.
We are in Jesus and when we give our life to Jesus, we aren't ourselves; who are we? We are Jesus.
Paul said this: “I am no longer myself, I am Christ; I am not life for I died in Christ; I have the Life.” He spoke for each one of us.
It was our life that the Holy Spirit was explaining to Saint Paul, it is our life that we are hearing at this very moment. We’re alive, we’re beings created to love the being that we are unconditionally.
Before he saw who he was, Paul was part of the world; he wanted to love God, he wanted to do everything for his God and so he persecuted all those who believed in a man who was claiming to be the Son of God. He, he believed in the laws of God, of Moses, received from God. He believed in them; he also believed in the laws Moses had received from God himself while he lived in the desert; Paul believed in all this.
Was there any reason to reproach Paul? There was no reason to reproach Paul – he was doing as the law asked, but one day, he was struck by the Light: “I shall show you who you are on the inside.”
Then, he became blind for three days, three days of darkness, three days that he spent in an inner light; then he learned, learned to be alone with his God.
God said to him, “Why are you persecuting me?” Ah! Then he recognized, he recognized his God – not externally – he recognized his God in his own life, in his inner life. Then, God enabled him to discover his love, enabled him to discover to which extent he himself was love, love for God.
He had become a being ready to fight for God because everything he saw now was the truth, everything he heard was justice, everything he said was faith, everything he did was God's will. And so, Paul was no longer himself; he was the love that was inside him: an unconditional love.
Because, for those of you who have read the Bible, do you remember that he even reproached Peter, our first vicar, for not always being in his unconditional love. Because Peter, when he was with pagans, the Gentiles, everything was nice, everything was good, he would evangelize, he was okay, but as soon as he found himself among his own… Oh! He would even pretend that he didn’t know the Gentiles and Paul reproached him because of this movement.
He would simply say to him, “Be unconditional love, be what you are on the inside, love unconditionally with the love of Christ and not with your love, which is still in your movement; you must allow yourself to be transformed.” And Peter, he saw all this and he took one more step.
Our vicar took one more step in his own love and not in Paul’s love, but in his own love: he saw himself with Jesus, he saw himself, during those three years, walking with his God of love; he saw how much he had hurt his Jesus of love three times.
He was all alone with his Jesus inside himself and then, he let himself be healed by the unconditional love of Jesus. He became unconditional in his love for Christ because he went as far as death; he didn’t want to displease Jesus, to whom he belonged: in Christ.
All the apostles were the unconditional love of Christ for God the Father. So, what is the difference between them and us? There is none; we have that same love inside us.
It isn't because it’s two thousand and seven years after Jesus Christ, who died, was resurrected and glorified by God, that we haven't received what the apostles received by the almightiness of the Holy Spirit: light, truth, peace, joy – we have this within us, we have this love within us.
Jesus comes to speak in hearts by the almightiness of the Holy Spirit; Jesus comes to enable us to discover who we are, all together, amidst those who deny Jesus, amidst this great apostasy.
We have to look at ourselves, we have to have the gaze of Jesus turned towards our inner selves and not turned externally; it’s not on the outside that we’re going to discover that unconditional love; it’s not the outside that will enable us to obtain what we need to grow before God. We have grown enough – me, I know that I won't grow anymore, nor you, but we’re talking about love, to grow in love, to be true to myself.
All this is so that we can stop suffering externally, all this is to prevent Satan from continuing to manipulate us, from continuing to manipulate our children, our husband or our wife, our family, our huge family that is all over the world and this, this has been so since the beginning of the earth.
And so, we’re made of love; God loves us unconditionally, he teaches us.
Everything we’re hearing is written in the Gospel; this is nothing new. But how great it is that the Holy Spirit uses instruments like us to speak in hearts, to the inner life of those who don’t love themselves, of those who don’t believe in an unconditional love because if we’re here together, that’s because God is using each one of us. He's gathering all your hearts to speak to the very heart of the Church.
We’re all instruments – I am one just as you are. Me, I'm simply a microphone, the guitar or the paintbrush – it doesn’t matter. The paintbrush uses colours, the paintbrush is applied to the canvas; the guitar requires a movement, requires the wood of which it is made, it requires strings; we, together, are all of this.
Who can say who the paintbrush is today? Who can say who the guitar is? Me, I am Francine, and you, every one of you, you are Huguette, Diane, you are Monique, Théo, Nicole, Yvan; each and every one of us, we are all together.
And so, if God wants to use the paintbrush of a certain woman or a certain man to put a certain colour in a place where a child needs to see the sun today, well, then God will place the colour yellow in his life: the sun.
So, you see, the Holy Spirit enables us to understand that we’re all girls of My Will in Jesus, and don’t belong to this world; we’re all boys of My Will in Jesus, and don’t belong to this world.
We’re all being used in this very moment to nourish love, a love that will enable us to go on in this world until the end, until the moment when we will present ourselves before God the Father.
God loves us; this is the reason why we hear. We don’t need to gather together to hear a human will; human will has nothing to contribute to our interior, human will doesn’t nourish, it is simply in constant conflict with another will: “You have nothing to show me, go home.”
But the Spirit of God, he has that power to use us on behalf of all the children of the world. We are a little group here, and yet, God uses who we are on behalf of his entire Church, on behalf of the entire world, in order to always give them love, always, always, always.
Before us there were those who had been instructed by God to give us love; since they themselves were love on the inside, then this brought love to us.
Do you remember Job? What love! What a man! He gave everything to his God.
He loved his God so much that he never said a thing against his God although his wife had turned against him, although his children were called away, although his flocks were dispersed and they were no longer there; his health had disappeared, he had nothing left.
But he did have something: unconditional love. This, nobody was able to take this away from him, especially not Satan. It was Satan's goal to take that unconditional love away from him by upsetting his life; by taking his children away from him, he wanted to poison that love; by taking away all his wealth, he wanted to poison that love; by taking away his health, he wanted to upset him.
He did everything he could to upset him in order to decrease his love for God even by one ounce. And God revealed his almightiness, he revealed his presence in Job: he enabled what was within Job to emerge.
For there were friends around him and they wanted to upset him from the outside, from the outside. They wanted to show him that he wasn’t faithful to God; they wanted to show him that he was a sinner; they wanted to show him that he wasn’t in the truth; they wanted to show him that his love was a calculating love, hypocritical, a weak love.
And Job kept his love; he shut his eyes to what he was seeing, he shut his ears to what he was hearing, because as soon as he would hear, he would turn to God; as soon as he would see that his wife wasn’t always where she should have been, he would turn to God, for he had temptations as well, and he always, always turned to his God; therefore, nothing could upset him.
But in order to keep that love, he had to do something: he humiliated himself before God. He didn’t humiliate himself before men – he didn’t have a thing to prove to men because that unconditional love was within him.
And so, before his God, he covered himself in ashes and he spoke to his God as the basest of beings appearing before his God, in order to say to him, “Love me, I love you. Cover me, do as you wish with me, I am ready to accept anything, I am ready to give myself up hundreds and hundreds of times for you. Look at what I am and have pity on me; my love for you is unconditional, my love for you nourishes me, it satisfies me. O God of love, your gaze is upon me and I do not doubt this; teach me to be even more little, for through this, I shall obtain everything from you. O God of love, I love you!”
The gazes of Job were like this, the thoughts of Job were like this. We are loved by Job because Job is a role model of love to us, a breath of life. That unconditional love is within us, he was within God, and therefore, he – Job – is in our life.
All those words that were part of his life are in our life. Are we able to separate ourselves from those words? Can we say, “Bah! Job, that’s from the old days; that’s from another era; that’s not part of my love”? Well, if we say this, then we’re claiming that we’re separated from God.
We cannot separate ourselves from those words of love because they were in God; it was God who was nourishing Job with his love and Job was allowing himself to dive into that love, and he adored him, he contemplated his Love, he was serving his God.
And so we, we’re with Job, we’re in that love, we’re all here to serve God, to contemplate God, to adore God – this is what it means to be a child of God: it’s to discover that love that dwells in us, it’s to discover our own love.
All love needs time to rest and so we’re going to rest for a few minutes.
Thank you, Holy Spirit.